cigarsandcoke:

I’m stuck between wanting to be an adult, accomplishing a lot, and contributing a lot to society and lying on my floor, ignoring my responsibilities, and crying to sad songs alone in my room.

I hate being up alone with my thoughts. I start thinking about the future and what my life will be like. Will I get married? Will I have kids? And how many? Then the thought occurs to me; what if I don’t have that long of a future? We tend to think of the future as something that is guaranteed. Usually we don’t even question it. We make plans and live our lives. But that could instantly be taken away. What happens then? That honestly terrifies me more than anything in the entire world.